Tips to get thru IVF

I have been doing a lot of reflecting lately on what behaviors and habits worked well for me and kept the stress to a minimum during my last IVF cycle.  Thought I'd post them:

• Keep a sense of humor - the more serious you are during your cycle, the higher the stakes will feel and the pressure will be too much.  Keep it light-hearted and you will keep the stress down as well. 
• Focus on one thing at a time - if you are stimming, don't worry about embryo transfer, etc.  Getting too far ahead of the game increases stress.  Thinking about all the stages of IVF is overwhelming if it is thought of all at once.  Learn as much as you can about the IVF process as a whole before you start your official cycle.  Once you start, breaking the cycle up into bite-sized pieces is much better and more manageable emotionally as well as physically.
• Join an online buddy group - I poo-pooed this idea at first but it was really surprising to see how much these groups have helped me get through our cycle and our resulting BFN.  Infertility is a very lonely road, but it doesn't have to be.  Millions of women across the world are going through the same thing.  Online groups are a good, easy way to give and receive support from women who know exactly what you are going through.
• Ask your nurse questions often - that is a big part of their job description.  There were times when I felt like I was being a nag and asking dumb questions, but I was always proven otherwise.  And always ask your nurse or RE questions instead of asking Dr. Google!  There is a lot of misleading and inaccurate info out there.
• Let your spouse in - chances are that your spouse is feeling similar feelings that you are.  Just because it may seem that you are doing all the work (taking shots, going to appointments, etc) doesn't mean that he doesn't feel overwhelmed or stressed as well.  Take the time to explain how you are feeling so that he may give the support that you need.
• Keep a gratitude journal - to keep things in perspective, try to find 3 things everyday that you are grateful for.  It may seem hard at first but it will get easier as time goes on.  Check this out if you are having trouble finding gratitude: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXDMoiEkyuQ
• Maintain a healthy lifestyle - eat healthy - organic when possible, keep processed and fast food to a bare minimum, go on daily walks for stress release, do yoga if it relaxes you.  If there ever was a time to take care of yourself, this is it!  Your mind and body will thank you.
• Take time to enjoy simple things - try to take a 5 minute time out everyday and enjoy something simple.  Play with your dog, buy yourself fresh flowers, take a nice hot bubble bath, spend some time just sitting and looking for the beauty in your surroundings. 
• Meditate often - the best news about meditating is that you don't need to buy anything and you can be anywhere to do it.  Of course it is best to be in a place where you can relax your body and you will not be interrupted.  There are a countless number of free iphone apps that can be used as aids and there is Circle and Bloom as well if you are willing to spend a bit to get full guided relaxation that is imperative during an IVF cycle.  http://www.circlebloom.com/get-started/ivf-program/
• Trust your body - during an IVF cycle you are injecting all sorts of drugs and making some pretty unreasonable and unnatural demands on your body.  It is easy to get paranoid that your body is not cooperating or have doubts that all this work is not going to result in a baby.  But sometimes you are going to just have to tell your mind to "Shut up!!".  A little patience here will go a long way.  Your body knows what it needs to do and you just need to let it happen.
• Keep hopes high, but do not have high expectations - you may worry that it will hurt more if you have high hopes and your cycle is not successful.  This is true - it will hurt if you have an unsuccessful cycle.  But you will learn to move on and heal.  There is no substitute for thinking positively, visualizing conception and carrying a baby to term.  We are human and it is perfectly healthy and normal to have hopes and dreams.  However, expectations are premeditated disappointments and are not healthy to have for an IVF cycle.  These will elevate the stakes and will impose too much pressure on yourself that is counterproductive.
• Let go and let God - in the end, it is God who will bless us with a baby.  There is so much that seems to ride on the woman's body during IVF and so much to do to prepare.  She needs to exercise, but not too much; eat well, but not too well - fat is good for TTC; take vitamins, but not too many; etc, etc, etc.  But really... while we do have control over our bodies to a certain extent, no matter what my husband and I do, we cannot control the outcome.  Do not look at this as something that is frustrating, see it as something to be relieved about.  It's not all in your hands!