Last night right before bed I started feeling sharp twinges on the lower right side of my uterus. I instantly thought “Oh no, is this what a tubal pregnancy feels like??” That would be terrible to have the embryo implant in the tube instead of the uterus! Then not only would they have to remove my tube, but they would have to end the pregnancy as well. So I just tried to ignore it. The twinges were not constant and came and went. They weren’t painful really – more like ovulation pain. It seemed to get better with my warm hand on top of my uterus. So I still had the twinges this morning and there was more of a constant dull cramping all on the right side. I called my clinic and spoke to a nurse. She cheerily assured me this type of pain is all totally normal and that it is probably due to the stretching of the ligaments that hold my uterus in place. I told her I was paranoid about an ectopic (tubal) pregnancy and she said that what I was describing doesn’t sound consistent with a tubal - they are accompanied with blinding pain. She said that ectopics are rare even with ivf but they do happen and went on to say that there is no way to know if it is an ectopic at this point since I’m not very far along yet. It will be hard to find the embryo on ultrasound. A part of me was hoping that she would tell me that I could go in for an ultrasound tomorrow while I was there for bloodwork – but I would be too early I guess. If I’m still worried on Friday she said I could call and get an order for an ultrasound over the weekend since at that point I will be 6 weeks and the embryo will be bigger. She said that typically with ectopics, the beta levels are either way too high or too low & don’t double normally. They will have a better idea tomorrow when they get my 3rd beta but she said that so far my betas have been right in line with a normal pregnancy. So we’ll see I guess! Then this afternoon the twinges started up on my left side too. So I guess the nurse is right that its nothing to be worried about.
I am getting so tired of thinking up different ways to google "chemical pregnancy statistics" though! But something of some value that I learned in my hopeless googling is that doctors typically refer to chemical pregnancies as such very early on. A HPT may have detected hCG but then either hCG levels didn’t show up on a blood test or they didn’t double adequately. The type of miscarriage that happens between the beta blood tests and the ultrasound to find the heartbeat (where the pregnancy can then be called a “clinical pregnancy”) is commonly called a “blighted ovum”. So I guess what I am worried of now is not a chemical pregnancy anymore but a blighted ovum. Both are caused by the same thing – either issues with the uterus and hormones supporting the uterine lining or chromosomal abnormalities with the embryo – and both are very common, but the blighted ovum happens a bit less than the chemical pregnancy does. The blighted ovum is just further along than a chemical pregnancy I guess. I am really tired of worrying about it though! I want to be looking up baby names, baby clothes, furniture, maternity wear and browsing the Babies R Us website but I am afraid to get too ahead of myself! It has been so painful getting here and I don’t want to cause myself any more unnecessary pain by starting to make plans for this little one to come in to our lives if it’s still not meant to be. Just another week and 2 days before we will know something!
After we hear the heartbeat though I am strongly considering buying an at home fetal Doppler machine! When I first heard of women doing that I thought they were nuts! But now I definitely understand the value of that kind of reassurance. Plus these machines are really cheap at about $50! Some have features where you can actually record the heartbeat and save it as an mp3 file. Then it can be saved on a computer and used in a digital scrapbook or sent to relatives, etc. How cool is that?! I really hope we get to that point!
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