Gender! It's a.....

GIRL!!!!

We found this out quite some time ago but only started letting people know last week once we saw a heartbeat. With this bleeding though, it has distracted me from posting:/ But ya, it's a girl!  After our 3rd beta, I asked my nurse if she had that info. She told me right then and there. So exciting!!  Same as before with Kellen, I do not care at all what the gender is. But a girl will be such a great addition and I won't be outnumbered anymore...lol!  My husband's jaw dropped when I told him (he is excited but slightly intimidated😛). Both of us were just assuming that the embryo was a boy. But nope!!!  So now we have plenty of time to prepare for new clothes and decor. My mother in law said she will sew ruffles on all our existing boy clothes. Lol!  And luckily all the big gear that we bought for Kellen is gender neutral so we'll be good there. 

Anyway, here's the latest pic of baby girl!

7w2d update

I had monitoring again yesterday morning. Everything went well. My beta is now 39000+ and p2 is 30. My u/s showed the baby is developing nicely - measuring on track at 7w2d and good heart rate of 139 bpm! My SCH hasn't shrunk but it hasn't grown either and is located low in my uterus while baby is high. Hopefully that indicates a lower chance of it messing with the placenta. Plan is to go back next Tuesday and then I'll be released if all is looking good. 

Other than that, I'm just sitting over here still bleeding a kaleidoscope of colors. I could make some really interesting artwork with all the pads I'm going through. Sorry that was gross 😖. Seriously though it's only been 1.5 weeks since the initial bleed and I'm so over it. The initial one cleared up pretty fast but my last bleed on Saturday gets brown, then barely nothing and I think it's gone - then next time I go to the bathroom...oh great, the red is back again. It's been going back and forth like that about 3 times so far. It's really making it hard to feel confident. Thankfully, everything is going great with the baby. But still....Also, still nervous about my RE wanting to take me off PIO shots and release me after my 8w scan next week, put me on endometrin for 2 weeks, then done. After they release me, my p2 levels won't be checked anymore. Just makes me nervous with this SCH. What if it's messing with the placenta?  Silver lining though would be I can go to my OB and finally feel like I'm being taken care of.  Just have to trust that they know what they're doing I guess!

Bleeding part 2

And I'm bleeding again. It started this morning around 10 (luckily we skipped my son's swimming lesson today otherwise I woulda been bleeding in the pool!). Earlier in the morning I was having some pretty bad cramps. I tried to ignore them, remain calm, and drank a lot of water. By 9 or so, they had subsided but an unsettled feeling remained. So I was not surprised when the red bleeding started not long after. So annoying. Today was my hubby's birthday too.  We were planning to go to my in laws house and swim in their neighborhood pool with our son and brother and sister in law. I managed to remain calm when the bleeding started though and we did not cancel our plans. Obviously I couldn't go to the pool, but I knew I could still go to their house and relax (maybe nap) while they were at the pool and then have fun with them when they returned. 

Anyway, while we were driving there, I called my clinic again and got a call back quickly. Same story as last Monday - it'll be ok, unless I'm saturating a maxi within an hour, it's just my SCH acting up again. They said I didn't need to book an ultrasound for tomorrow as I already have one scheduled for Tuesday. Unless the bleeding gets worse or doesn't stop, waiting will be fine since the baby looked good last Tuesday. If it does get really heavy though, I should go to the ER. They said to stay off my feet today, no lifting,  no exercise, drink lots of water, pelvic rest, and stay calm. Once the bleeding subsides, I can resume normal activity. 12 hours later, my bleeding has lessened and is now more of a brownish color. It's really the same pattern that I had last Monday - bright red bleeding that was relatively light, but still a steady "dribble", then gradually got lighter, and finally just brown streaking on my pantyliner. So I should be ok I hope. 

It's such a frustrating reminder that I have this SCH though. Why can't I just have a normal, carefree pregnancy?  Is that too much to ask?!  I did not have anything in my underwear for 3 straight days prior to today and I was hoping that the hemorrhage would be shrinking at my next ultrasound. Now it looks like that might not be the case. 

Further exacerbating this is the fact that should things get really bad, I cannot get in-person care here unless it's at the ER. No fertility clinic will see me and my OB will not see me. I confirmed this last Thursday.  So I still have to go to this imaging center. The tech from last week was the best I've encountered so far so hopefully I get her again. But still, they are just techs - they can't read and deliver diagnoses with patients - the doc has to do that. However my doc, in not being able to discuss results with the tech, has limited information as well. So I'm the middle man not really knowing everything. For example - had the tech told me that I had an SCH, I would've asked for more information like size, location, etc. this info wasn't communicated on the report that was sent to my doc - just that it was a "moderately sized SCH". This wouldn't be an issue if my OB would just see me but they won't even schedule me until my RE releases me. And then, appointments are scheduled for 2-3 weeks out. I'm sure they'd see me sooner if I was bleeding but still. My release date should be a week from Tuesday IF everything is going well. If I still have bleeds I don't know if they'll release me.  Further giving me unrest is the fact that upon my release, my RE won't be monitoring my progesterone and they'll start weaning me by switching me to endometrin (a progesterone suppository). I'll be on that for 2 weeks and then done. It just seems way to early. Especially if I have this SCH and if it's messing with the placenta. 

So at this point I'm rambling as frankly I'm exhausted - but at least I'm feeling better now that I've unloaded my thoughts.  I'm just feeling very unsettled in this pregnancy. Deep down I do feel like all will be ok but it is still just so incredibly hard!  Hopefully this spotting stays that way. I hate this bleeding. 

6w2d...Oh great - I have a SCH:/

I got the call back from my nurse recently.  Beta is up to 13756 and progesterone is 46 - really good.  My nurse also confirmed that my ultrasound results were good.  Baby is right on track.

BUT I have a moderately sized SCH (subchorionic hemorrhage).  I've heard of many IVFers who get these.  Both they and their babies have survived - but they often report sudden episodes of gushing blood combined with passing clots.  VERY scary indeed!  It's a mystery what these things actually are and how they come to be, but essentially they are a pocket of blood within the uterus that can cause bleeding episodes and sometime in worst cases, a miscarriage if the SCH affects the placenta.  I don't quite know where mine was in relation to the sac.  I now know what that 2nd spot was that the tech was measuring and it seemed like it was a fair enough distance away.  So hopefully the danger of it affecting the placenta (which is still developing right now) is minimal.  Often times, these SCHs resolve on their own.  Other times, they last a lot longer - sometimes the entire pregnancy.  Prognosis seems to vary from doctor to doctor.  Some will be all gloom and doom and will give a 50/50 chance of miscarriage and prescribe progesterone & bedrest.  Others brush it off, just monitor the pregnancy closer, and recommend to take it easy.  My clinic seems to take the latter approach - although I'm still on progesterone.  We will just have to wait and see what happens with me though.  The nurse said that we really can't do anything about it but I should stay on pelvic rest and take it easy until we see the size going down.  I am so glad the baby is ok though.  And I'm trying to focus on my nurse saying that most of the time SCHs are just scary and annoying.  She said to call if I experience bleeding again and they'll have me go in to get checked out.  My next ultrasound/bloodwork appointment will be next Tuesday unless I start bleeding again.  

Monitoring Results

I just got back from my ultrasound.  Everything seems to be fine with the baby.  It has grown since last Friday and the heartbeat rate has increased to 136 bpm.  The fetal pole is definitely there and is measuring 6w3d - right on track.

So now I just have to wait for a call back from my nurse with my progesterone and beta results and see if any adjustments to my meds need to happen.  Interestingly, when I woke up this morning, I was not dripping but was still bleeding.  I usually take my progesterone shot at 6:30am.  I got up, took the shot, and went back to bed until 8am.  When I woke up again, the bleeding was gone and I just had brown spotting.  So I don't know if maybe my progesterone levels are too low or what.  Or maybe my cervix is just causing issues.  Maybe there will be blood in my uterus that the ultrasound reveled.  The tech couldn't tell if there was blood but she said the radiologist would review the films and would be able to tell.

In the meantime, I can rest easy knowing the baby is ok.  I just have to pray that my body is continuing to cooperate.

Bleeding hangover

I got an order for bloodwork and ultrasound today from my RE.  The on-call doc who I spoke with yesterday night said it was mainly to ease my mind - but I don't know.  I would think they'd want some reassurance too.  I got my bloodwork done already and I'll go in for ultrasound in about an hour.  I'm hoping that I can talk the tech in to talking to me more and showing me the screen this time since my anxiety levels will be thru the roof I bet.

I started bleeding last night after dinner.  I was cleaning up and felt a lot of wetness down there.  I peeked in my undies and saw bright red.  My stomach dropped and I went to sit on the toilet and got a pantyliner.  More blood came out.  Bright red, not clotty though and not gushing - more of a drip drip drip.  There is absolutely nothing like seeing that bright red color in the toilet though when you are pregnant.  My mind immediately thought the worst.  I bled pretty much all night.  I soaked thru a pantyliner and then it seemed to slow down.  When I woke this morning, it was more of a brown discharge.  So hopefully it's over.

Right after I started bleeding, I called my RE and left a message for the on-call doc.  She called me back within the hour and told me that 9 times out of 10, bleeding doesn't lead to anything.  Cervix is sensitive, could be breakthru bleeding, etc.  I had mild cramping too and asked about that.  She said it was probably nothing but to ease my mind, go in for monitoring tomorrow.  I was supposed to go on a 12 hour site visit today to southern Indiana which would involve walking around all day in 90 degree heat.  I asked if I should cancel going to this and she said that walking would not be the issue, but dehydration and heat would.  So I canceled that trip and opted to work from home instead today.  Probably for the best as I am now able to go get an ultrasound - which I need to start getting ready for... so I'll post again after.  Hopefully I have good news to report.

Please God again... please let us keep this baby.

Bleeding

I just had a long post written out and I accidentally deleted it. Grrr!

Basically the gist is that I'm bleeding. I'm freaking out. The doc said not to worry, 9 times outta 10 it's nothing, but get checked out tomorrow. Since I'm an outta town patient, I might not be able to do that til Wednesday. Cramping too. Awesome. 

Please God let us keep this baby. Please...but if it's You're will, grant us the strength to accept whatever happens.