Slow embryos on days 1-3=bad eggs?

I got my records from my RE and on day 3, 4 of our embies were either 2 or 3 cells. I had 1 at 4 cells and another at 5 cells. Those last 2 went on to be compacting embies on day 5. The others all arrested on day 3. Aren't they supposed to be at least 6 cells on day 3? All had about 25% fragmentation. So I’m wondering if this is an egg issue? We're dealing with male factor infertility and ovulation issues with me so I guess I'm sort of surprised to see our status on day 3. I guess there is no test to test for bad eggs - that test is IVF in fact. So you never know what you are going to get until you actually get the eggs out. Something to bring up at our follow-up consult I suppose.

Vitamins, vitamins, vitamins!

While we are waiting to hear about what happened with our last cycle, we are moving on and gearing up for another IVF cycle in a couple months. I have added 1000 (don't know the unit) of Royal Jelly to the rest of my supplements. I was already taking vitamins E, C, B complex, prenatal, omega 3, & coq10. I also started taking myoinositol, melatonin, and L-arginine. Hubby is on multi, vitamins E, C, B12, Lcarnitine, Larginine, coq10, zinc, selenium and just started him on pycnogenol & royal jelly. PHEW!! Don't even want to begin to think about how much $ I've spent so far on vitamins alone. But I have realized that there are a lot of deals to be found regarding vitamins if you are willing to look around. My grocery store and CVS routinely has buy one get one free sales and also have found a lot of good deals online - www.swansons.com is a good site that has cheap vitamins. I may have gone off the deep end with the supplements but we'll see what happens! Really believe that they can make a difference. I feel really good when taking them, so hopefully that's a good indicator!

Cycle recap

My period came last Wednesday morning (the day of my beta ironically) and beta came back negative. Hubby & I spent all day weeping and feeling sorry for ourselves and then dragged ourselves out of the house the following day to go spend Thanksgiving Day with hubby's family. It was the best thing we could have done - to be around normal happy people. We didn't tell any of them about our IVF procedure so there weren't any questions or anything and we were thankful for that. The following day I set up a WTF (what the fuck) appt with our RE for Dec 6th, did some research on what to do for our next cycle, & did some looking at other clinics.

To recap our previous IVF cycle, my stim response was borderline OHSS (ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome). I was "coasting" a lot. I didn't feel uncomfortable at all, but my E2 (estradiol) number was too high. They put me on Cabergoline to prevent OHSS after triggering ovulation with HCG and got 10 eggs, 8 mature, and 6 fert normally with ICSI. By day 5 we had 2 compacting embies - no blasts or morulas. Usually about 1/3 of fertilized embryos will make it to blastocyst stage on day 5. - but ours were slow We transferred both of the embryos that were still alive and did not have any frosties. I had a positive outlook up until our embryo transfer day when we didn't have any blasts. I kept my negativity to myself but just didn't have the best feeling. The embryologist said not to worry, that they see embies like ours make it to blast by day 6 all the time - but that didn't really appease me. I spent the next 1.5 weeks trying to relax and distract myself. But last Tuesday night my cramps and spotting started and I broke down. Hubby was still positive, said that he read stories about women spotting and cramping during early pregnancy, but I just knew. Sure enough, my period showed up that following morning. I was on progesterone suppositories too - so not really sure why my period showed. My nurse said that "that happens sometimes" though so I guess I won't worry about that.

It's official... BFN

Well, this cycle is officially a bust. Aunt Flow showed her ugly face this morning and beta just came back negative.

Don't have a good feeling

I really hate to be a downer but I had a meltdown today. I started spotting and having period-like cramps at work. When I finally got home, I broke down. My hubby did some quick googling for me and told me to relax - that from what he could see, lots of ladies have spotting and cramping when they are preggo - but I just don't know. This feels like the ugly witch is on her way even though I'm still on progesterone. I am not expecting much from my beta tomorrow morning if the witch stays away that long. Just trying to keep it in perspective - if it's negative, I'm not going to die or anything - we'll just re-group and try again.

Not testing before beta

I am not testing before my beta test on Wednesday. I just can't do it! I am enjoying the dream too much to ruin it and create too much anxiety:( I so want to know though! I'm only 2 days away - well really only 1 day now. So if I got thru the past couple days without testing, I'm going to wait. Just starting to get so so so nervous! At least we have plan B - trying again immediately when our insurance rolls over next year... trying to stay positive though.

5dp5dt update

I am 5dp5dt (5 days past 5 day transfer) today and am surprised at how easily I've been able to resist testing. Cramps did come back for me last night with some pretty noticeable pinches and boobs are slightly tender. But all can be explained by progesterone I guess. I am wondering when the Aunt Flow typically arrives in an IVF cycle if it fails? After progesterone support stops or does it just come when it usually comes? Well, time will tell - hopefully my period will just stay away for 9 months!

Bed rest

I just really don't get why all the bed rest is needed. I even asked the nurses if it was okay to do a #2 because they were so hyped up on the bedrest. Either progesterone or the HCG shot made me so backed up (sorry tmi) so I was concerned. But the nurse laughed and said that they won't fall out during a BM. Have there been studies done about bed rest being effective? Haven't googled that yet - maybe that will be what I distract myself with tomorrow. Maybe that was our problem all along with trying to conceive naturally! I just never took enough bedrest when the embryos were ready to hatch!

The 2ww is literally making me nuts! Every little twinge makes me wonder "What was that??" I am so in tuned to my body right now it's ridiculous. Breaking out the meditation apps tomorrow and going to my acupuncturist for some much needed stress release!

Giving google a rest today

I'm doing better today. I took another day off of work to take it easy some more. I didn't do as much obsessive googling so that was good. My hubby was home so he was keeping an eye on me. I did read though that embies are typically classified as morulas once they reach 16 cells and are compacting. The embryologist said yesterday that our ricecakes were compacting 20 cell embies - so I'm just thinking of them as morulas. I do read good things about 5-day morulas turning into healthy babies so keeping my fingers crossed that's what the case is with me too!

Good chances for our embies

Got a call from the embryologist. She said our embies were indeed slow and were not quite morulas yet but they have seen plenty of embies like mine make it to blast by day 6 and there was no reason to think that they haven't reached the blast stage right now:). So hopefully she is right! She did say that I'm about a day behind with implantation though. There's nothing wrong with that but if they are blasts now, they would hatch and implant tomorrow. So I donno. I might take another day of bed rest. I applied for FMLA before all this started so I'm just using that for ER and for ET instead of vacation time.

Too much googling!

Ugh! Can't get my eyes away from my laptop. I'm on day 2 of bedrest but cannot stop researching/looking for info on compacting embies on day 5. I should have asked for more info yesterday at the transfer but they had me take the valium right away so of course I was worthless after that! I asked the RE doing my transfer (not my regular RE) if my embies were morulas but she flatly said 'no' and that was all. No further info like: 'they are almost morulas', or 'they don't have much of a chance', etc. Didn't have an opportunity to talk to the embryologist yesterday either. I will be calling them later today though to hopefully get my questions answered. For now at least they are inside me though which is probably the best place for them to be. And I've read through all my ridiculous researching today that slow embies may mean that they are girls. I really don't care either way, but I think I am subconsiously hoping for a girl. Well - off to find a good movie to watch to get my mind off this stuff!

Transfer update

We just got back from our transfer. It went well. But only 2 of 6 made it to day 5 so I'm sort of disappointed. I guess they say to expect that 1/3 will make it to day 5 but I was just hoping we would defy the statistics. We transfered 2 and have none to freeze. Also the 2 we transfered are not quite blasts yet which I am not thrilled about. The embrologist said that they are progressing nicely and are compacted which means that they will probably divide again soon and become blasts - but still, I'm just a bit unsettled. Trying to stay positive though! Our beta is scheduled for the day before Thanksgiving and I just tested my trigger to make sure the HCG was out of my system in case I can't stand it anymore and have to test. Sure enough, BFN, so that's good! I could see myself testing next Sunday or Monday. I'm just so glad that we had something to transfer and that the viable embies are inside me now!! Here's the pic that we got of our 2 bitty ricecakes:



24 hours to go

Less than 24 hours to go until we know the fate of our embies. Hopefully this time tomorrow I'll be PUPO (pregnant until proven otherwise)!! Just going to keep myself busy today with anything that PUPO ladies shouldn't do in the 2ww like yard work since it's such a nice day. If the transfer goes as planned, it'll be a good 2 days of bed rest awaiting me. Will post an update tomorrow!

Nanny-cams

Not much is going on today. Just trying to think about other things! We have embryo transfer scheduled for Sunday at 10:30am and we can call at 8:30am to see if our embryos are still viable. UGH! I should have asked them a couple months ago how often the embryologists communicate with the patients while in the 5 day wait to see how their embryos progress. I just didn't really think of it before I guess. I told my hubby today that they should install nanny-cams in the incubators so we can check up on them. Not like I'd be able to tell the difference between a high and low quality embryo, but it would ease my mind nonetheless!

Fertilitzation report

Got our fert report!
10 eggs retrieved
8 mature
6 fertilized normally via ICSI

Won't get another update until right before our transfer next Sunday. Ugh!! There is no part of this process that isnt riddled with anxiety!

The embryologist said that they won't look at them again until Sunday morning so calling them isn't going to help. What?? They aren't going to even look at them? Argh! Feel like they should at least check in on them - at least a peak on day 3!! But I guess there isn't really anything they can do for them between now and Sunday - just have to wait it out. So I guess I have to do the same. All this waiting is for the birds - especially now that we have something growing! Up until now it was only the promise of something.

Egg retrieval update

I weighed myself this morning to get a baseline before egg retrieval and already gained a pound! I've been literally chugging gatorade like it's my job. I have a bladder the size of a peanut so I will be up peeing all night long I'm sure! 

They got 10 eggs today. RE said that was good. Egg retrieval went well - so easy! Was really dopey afterwards. Kept asking my hubby if he got his 'homies' out okay. LOL. Just a bit out of it still right now. We find out tomorrow how many were mature and how many fertilized. Wish they would tell us the number of eggs that were mature today, but oh well. Just trying to distract myself, watching crappy daytime TV and may go vote later if I feel up to it.

Egg retrieval tomorrow morning

I am just loading up on fluids to prepare for my egg retrieval tomorrow morning. Pretty nervous about the aftermath and hoping I won't get OHSS but the nurse reassured me that it'll all be fine. My E2 is high - but not too high which is why they triggered me. She just said to PUSH the fluids to the point that I want to puke. LOL! So we'll see how it goes! Hoping to have a good number to report tomorrow and a good fertilization report on Wednesday!

Triggering tonight!

Triggering tonight for egg retrieval on Tuesday!

I'm triggering a bit early because my E2 level went waaayy up today to 5100. So RE has me on Cabergoline to prevent OHSS. Kinda takes the wind outta my sails a bit cuz know I don't know how many mature eggs they'll find. Hopefully it'll be enough.

Day 10 of stims

Ugh - still waiting on call from nurse but my ultrasound this morning showed that we didn't get much follie growth today. My E2 levels however were very high yesterday at 3000ish. It's good for my lining but not so good for keeping OHSS at bay. Nurse was saying that they may want to push me a day longer and trigger tomorrow to see if smaller follies catch up. Or depending on my E2 level - if it got higher - they may want to have me trigger tonight to prevent OHSS. Trying to figure out online if my follies are big enough to trigger. Nurse wasn't forthcoming with that info. Had 16 follies one at 20mm today but others were b/n 10-18mm. I'm reading that the HCG shot increase follie size a bit and brings them to maturity. So maybe I'll still have a good number of mature eggs. I don't know. Starting to get nervous!

Day 9 of stims

None of my shots really hurt. My acupuncturist is surprised that I don't have bruises all over my tummy. The follistim hurts more than the lupron for me because my injection pen doesn't push in so easy. I try to do the injections where my pants don't hit because they can pull my skin at the injection site and make it feel uncomfortable. Also I bleed if I slowly insert the needle instead of using the dart-like quick motion. Did that the other day when I had a blonde moment:P
My scan went well. Almost there! One more scan tomorrow morning. They want me to take a half dose of stim tomorrow and then trigger tomorrow night for ER on Tuesday! Whoo! Getting anxious!!

Day 8 of stims

RE monitored me yesterday. Had 16 follies from 8-16mm. E2 was 1800ish. That was up from 1200 the day prior so my levels had slowed and they said I could resume my follistim. Today had 16 follies again from 10-18mm. Good growth at about 2mm/day. But E2 was 2700ish!! Big change I guess. So they told me not to stim tonite and tomorrow morning. So tired of this back and forth. And I still really don't feel much. Am getting sorta sore in my ovarian region and am getting nauseous more often, but still not much. Just tired of daily blood draws in my arm. Hate those!! Starting to get track marks. Shots are fine, vaginal ultrasounds are unpleasant but fine but these blood tests are getting to be intolerable!!